In review: victim of discrimination?

After taking some time from my altercation with the librarian, I feel like I should reflect on the experience.

I did make mistakes. I shouldn't have waited until the last minute to look into getting a camera. I shouldn't have assumed, based on Marna's info, that the librarian was ok with lending me a camera. I should have accepted the changes to the expectations for me without questioning them and/or reminding her of her previous agreements.

However, in the long run, I wasn't in the wrong. I think that this person was projecting their personal concerns or difficulties with getting things done on time, or keeping commitments onto me without cause. I can't put a finger on it, but the experiences that I have indicate to me that perhaps the librarian has trouble with time management and being organized. Her behavior towards me indicates that she expected me to have the same problems, to the point where she felt it necessary to have two entire class periods of cushion time from when I returned the camera, until it was needed, in order to maker herself feel comfortable that it would be back in time. She seemed like she so overwhelmed and absorbed by her other duties, that it was more then she could handle to offer verbal advice or directions to me. It also showed arrogance that her needs were more important then treating me respectfully. There was clear bias towards me because I am a student teacher, rather then a certified teacher. I don't know if this librarian is a classified or certified employee, although the fact that she teaches a class indicates to me that she is probably certified, but I doubt that she would have given me so much trouble if I had been a first year teacher who needed to video tape her lesson, or if, like Marna, I was a veteran expert teacher who needed to tape themselves for an award they were receiving. It's possible that age played into it as well. I felt ridiculed for my youth, as if she was equating me with some stereotypical co-ed, partying it up every night and barely passing my classes.

It was an unfortunate experience, but one that I am glad to have. I will probably continue to run into people who will judge me or treat me differently based on my age, experience and gender. People will be rude, cruel, unfair and I will have to deal with it with professionalism and grace. I think that I did that fairly well this time, all things considered, and was still able to solve my problem by calling on other resources.